Friends, I am back from two days in Germany. The weather was very, snowy and on Saturday there was thunder and lightening with heavy snow. It was very strange. Driving home on the Autobahn was scarey and my upstate New York driving-in-snow-and-ice skills came in very handy. I succeeded in getting us back safe and sound. Grateful. Very grateful.

This morning I wanted to stay in bed. The rooms are so cold here at night and they are used to using heavy blankets and saving energy. WE are not so used to it. Conservation and environmental responsibility are everywhere here. It is interesting as they consume so much less than we do to begin with and yet we do not feel the responsibility or stewardship to the conservation of resources. I wonder where our ideas about entitlement come from but I digress.

Today the theme presenting, purely by experience, is the whole idea of community. What is community? What does healthy, welcoming, open community look like?

In my life, I find myself so often times, way outside the box. I stand on tiptoe looking in through the picture window, because of my marriage or my beliefs or my gender, often I "do not belong."
Yes, I am tired and a bit homesick, but aside from that, this is a Christian Community, and it is a hard place to "enter". Pondering this all morning and applying it to the church congregational community has made me very empathetic.

It has to be so very difficult for someone outside of "our circle" to enter into it. First, even to make the choice or decision to try, then to actually come, then to put themselves out there to participate. Think of how hard it would be for a non-churched person, for whom our customs and traditions are totally foreign,[like living in a foreign land and speaking a different language],
to decide, well "I think I will go to First Baptist Church of Brockport, to seek God and community." Why it is almost impossible to imagine it. Then to actually enter, well, where should I park and what door should I go in? And what do I say if someone speaks to me? Where should I sit? What are these page numbers in this program for? Do I have to sing? How will I know when to sit or stand? How will I know how to sing the tune? What if someone hears my voice and it isn't good enough? Will people be looking at me? What should I wear? Where does God live here, I don't see Him....Her....? How do I pray?

Today, I went early to chapel to pray. It was quiet with a few others praying and only the piano man playing some hymns and choruses, some of which I recognized and some I didn't. Groups and alliances have formed, among the full-time students who are working on certificates in Theology and live here year round, among the returning and new Ph. D. students with each other and with the faculty, among the Russian speaking students, among the English speaking students, with the U.S. students, with the U.K. students, with the Eastern European students, etc. etc......Because I am early and have sat, not in my usual chair [ahhhh, yes, that familiar pew]
but across from the main door, by the piano, I have positioned myself to watch as all the students come in the door. Each enters, generally one at a time, but sometimes in pairs, the man or the woman opens the door, steps in, [we sit in a circle] their eyes move/dart around the circle and you can see when recognition comes: "oh, yea, there is a familiar person, there is a friend, there is safety, place for me."

Here again, I find the gender gap even wider than in the states. A very lot of men, only lecturers are men, and very few women students. I observe the dynamics of learning as a wide flow, as if a river of communication is here happening with the men. One can almost see the women attempt to enter the flow, as if fighting the power upstream. It is that way also with the times of fellowship. The men speak, the women listen; and when the women speaks, it is as if she has crossed the red sea. In other words, a woman either needs to be so strong as to have the miraculous power of God or a very large army. I am reminded again that tenacity has its own rewards and learning, real learning, always involves suffering of one kind or another. I am also realizing a new the great courage it took for First Baptist Church of Brockport to call a woman as it's pastor. And once more I am filled with deep gratitude.


Today in my studies I have found a quote from Eleanor Roosevelt that described in her words the three assets of her life: 1. She was keenly interested. 2. She accepted both the challenges and the opportunities to learn 3. She had energy and discipline. [or perhaps even discipline for her energy.]

I believe that I have one and two but need to work on three. It is very easy in this time in which we live to become dis-illusioned, and/or overwhelmed by both information and the realities of our time. This is where faith must come in. Also disciplined energy is hard work.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
On a different note: In chapel this morning we did what was called, "circle prayers". Prayers were offered corporately for different peoples and then we all said in unison:
Circle us O God,
Circle us with your presence.

Keep love within,
Keep trouble out.

Keep faith within,
Keep fear out.

That is my prayer for our congregation, that is my prayer today for the community of Brockport, the city of Rochester and even to the ends of the world.

Peace!
Shalom!